Day five: The six things no one ever tells you about culinary school
Posted on | October 7, 2009
Months and months ago, when I started culinary school, I also started this blog. And I committed to you and to myself to write one blog post every day I was at school.
And I have.
But then something happened: Nothing.
Why shouldn’t you tell jokes to an egg?
~ Because it might crack up!
See, we only did two things in school today. First, we fabricated some ducks. That means we cut them into pieces (breasts, legs, etc.). Later this week we will make duck confit with the legs and saute the breasts.
Then we went into the classroom and talked about restaurant marketing. namely, all the things a restaurant can do to get you through the doors and buying more, from slipping $20 bills to the concierge at the nearest hotel to recommend your restaurant to having waitstaff offer to bring you another glass of wine, cup of coffee, dessert, etc.
Neither of which makes for a scintillating blog post. So, instead, I’m going to tell you the six things no one ever tells you about culinary school, but you wished they did.
Did you hear the joke about the peanut butter?
~ I’m not telling; you might spread it!
Culinary school is not a mecca of food
There is no in-depth exploration of ingredients, here. There is no discussion on pairing herbs, for example, or mixing spices. Sure, you get to use ingredients and mix spices, but you never gain an in-depth understanding of them. You are just too busy producing, producing, producing to spend much time exploring.
Remember, their goal is to train people to become kitchen workers, not to become food experts.
And they do this by having you churn out as much product as possible.
Experimentation is encouraged; and frowned upon
The chef’s love it when you experiment. But, heaven help you if your experiment should fail because both the chef and your fellow students will ridicule you mercilessly. I’ve produced foods that were dull, but I haven’t had this kind of failure so I’ve never been the butt of this type of relentless abuse. But I’ve seen it happen to other students and it can get pretty brutal. Which means I am hesitant to take any really big risks. Which is a shame. Isn’t school supposed to be a safe environment to experiment and, perhaps, fail (at least, that is how I run my classes)?
Everyone is in it for number one
After we fabricated our ducks, everyone was told to place their breasts in a freezer bag. So Other Guy went and got a freezer bag and put his breasts in it. And Make-Up Girl went and got a freezer bag and put her breasts in it. And Cucumber Chick went and got a freezer bag and put her breasts in it.
And so on.
I, however, was the only person that went and got a handful of bags so both I and the students who had yet to package their breasts could do so.
What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you?
~ Nacho cheese!
Most of the chef’s have superhuman patience
There are exceptions, of course, but outside of these, the sheer depth of patience of these chef’s is incredible. Especially when you partner that with the in-depth knowledge they are so willing to share.
The level of enthusiasm about food is wonderful
While it may be shocking to me how little so many of the students know about fine food (as far as I can tell, I’m the only student here who has ever heard of Saveur, who has a subscription to Gourmet, who even knows who Nigel Slater is), what is nice is their enthusiasm for it. An enthusiasm that is surpassed only by the chef’s.
The willingness of most of the chef’s to teach is great
Sure, this is another thing that is not universal. And, as these are chef’s, and not trained teachers, sometimes they are not the best communicators. But most of them are willing to try. And, if you can’t get what you need from one, you can always try any other chef you like, even if they are not your instructor. So, sooner or later, you are sure to get an answer.
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6 Responses to “Day five: The six things no one ever tells you about culinary school”
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October 7th, 2009 @ 8:06 am
This is so true! I couldn’t have put it better myself!
October 7th, 2009 @ 8:06 am
in fact we always had 1 kid in our class that was CONSTANTLY throwing people under the bus to be “#1″ – ugh was he annoying!
October 7th, 2009 @ 1:40 pm
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October 7th, 2009 @ 5:46 pm
Interesting perspective. I have always thought I would like to go to culinary school, but only as a personal interest, and not for professional cooking. Makes me wonder if I would survive there.
October 9th, 2009 @ 12:15 am
I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog. I too went to culinary school (the baking and pastry program) and it’s been interesting to see what goes on in your program.
When you talked about how everyone looks out for themselves, I remember that same thing from school. Not that it’s a bad thing to look out for yourself, but there are times that it would be nice if people could be a bit more considerate and help out those around you (as you demonstrated it can be done).
I can relate to your experiences–I was probably one of the oldest in my class (I was 34 and everyone else was 18-25) and dealt with similiar situations.
Anyhow, good luck in the rest of your program–it sounds like you are learning a lot.
October 9th, 2009 @ 1:27 pm
Boy, you captured culinary school PERFECTLY! I couldn’t help but giggled at your section about experimenting. Chef never let me forget about my creme brule experiment last semester – LOL!